Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

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Why was the black racist guy and the white racist guy, who 0hated each other, afraid of Michael Jackson? They didn't want to be the other each others color.

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What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

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What do Whitney Houston and Selena Gomez have in common? They are both dead. Exept for Selena Gomez..

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josh sucks polish adams dick

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Why did sara fall out of the tree? -she had no arms.. Knock knock. -who's there? not sara.

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I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A miracle

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the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

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Whats the difference between Amanda and Brittaney spears? Nothing, they are both worthless sluts

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hello

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

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dallen loves penis

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An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

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What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

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What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

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Why was Martha put in a wheelchair? She was hit by a rabid cabbage.

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Q-what did the bus say to the other bus? A-nothing, buses are incapable of talking

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

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A muslin walks into a bar, and has the same equal rights as everyone else and orders a pint of fosters.

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Who has two thumbs and gets to go home tomorrow? Well, not your son. He's in a persistent vegetative state and we had to amputate both of his arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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