I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

Bison: I just dont feel like having bread for breakfast again Sagat: You want some... Cornflakes? Bison: Ohohoh Ahahaha! Sagat: You like it? Bison: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Balrog: :( What about those tapes I made for you? You want me to...:( Bison: Balrog, shut up.

Children + my basement + my finger = yes

a dog and a duck went out for a meal they both ordered lobster and enjoyed the night.

What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

How do you get a person to stop talking to you? Ask nicely to please be quiet and let me talk.

What did Robert Kardashian say at O.J.'s most recent trial? Nothing. He died of esophagal cancer

Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

Whats worse than the Holocaust? reading posts on this website that arent antijokes. Seriously poeople... you cant just say something that random than put something tragic. it has to be funny and tragic.

What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

knowck knowck whos there? shea shea who? shea...duh!

2001, 2 airplains fly into the world trait centers. the pilots then had their licences taken away.

Knock knock.

What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

Q: What's the difference between between basketballs and babies? A: I don't shoot basketballs.

whats better than 7 babies in one trash can 1 baby in 7 trash cans

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

How do you make a black man sad? Kill his entire family.

knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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