Question: You are in a bed between a hot chick and a gay guy, who do you turn your back to? Answer: False, I am to unattractive to find myself in bed with anybody else.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Cannot tell, national security. As far as I care we are friends, therefore I cannot continue chatting with you for a while, its gonna seem pretty damn suspicious, I wont be repeating myself. Except again, do not worry, we will take care of this, and if not, I will contact you, you are not in any danger for the mean being, whoever are against us are looking for "Nero", not you, and I am pretty damn safe. By the way, I never lost an eye, but your "wiz" revealed himself by sharing that information, that part was the only ploy as far as I care, and it was necessary for everybody`s survival. Do not worry friend, I will call you sometime, but I recommend we stay off touch for at least 3 months, and that you stop using this site.

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How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

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What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

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rofl lol, the joke below me has made my computer offer to translate this page. It thinks it's in Spanish

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You spent your time reading this and realized there was no joke.

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What's black and white and red all over A bloody penguin

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What did Jesus say when he walked on water? I'm drowning

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What do you get when do you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence.

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you know its foggy outside when you step outside and its foggy outside.

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Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

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Hitler walks into a temple..... Oh wait he died

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What is covered in red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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What happens if u call a black kid names? He tells an adult and u get in trouble

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

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Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and catch them on fire.

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Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

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Why did the Italian family have spaghetti for dinner? Thats the only thing they had in the house

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People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

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Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

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What's the differece between a rock and a black guy? A rock can't eat fried chicken.

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why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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