What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

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69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

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ask me if i have a place to call home> 'have you a place to call home?' no im sad and lonely.

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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whats the difference between a chicken and a rooster. a rooster has a dick

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Your sex life.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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What is shit? It's Deshitified already.

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit!!

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A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

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What is a white supremacist's favorite color? It varies depending on the individual.

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whats white jizz

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Why didn't the millionaire jump off the Golden Gate Bridge? He said "I don't have to commit suicide, that's for poor people" (Wyndellberg)

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Chicken

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Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

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So a guy walked into the doctors and said, "It hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor said, "Well don't poke your leg like that."

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Duh!!!."

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What did the Nazi Death Camp Guard say to the escaping prisoner? - Nothing. He shot him in his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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