Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

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Q:Why did the dog jump over the fence A:Because he could

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I like to sniff your hair when you are asleep.

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Your eye color is very unique.

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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Asian NASCAR.

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Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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The economy.

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

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Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

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Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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