What's going to happen you? Your going to die just like everyone else in the world. Don't laugh, it's not funny

Why was the blonde fired from the factory? Repeated absences and violation of company policy.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken just lost his job and has entered into a deep depression. He was going to commit suicide at the local KFC, but as he walked into the KFC, he saw a beautiful woman. They lived a full and happy life together until the chicken died of old age. Turns out the woman was blind, and partially deaf.

Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

How did baby Bobby spend his summer vacation? He didn't, he died from heat exhaustion.

Roses are red, violets are blue, grass is green, sky is blue, dirt is brown, fire is orange, water is transparent, powder is white

Roses are red, Violets are violet, If you think Violets are blue you're an idiot because they're called violets for a reason.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care what a chicken thinks?

why cant stevie wonder read? because hes black

Person 1: Why don't you want to date me? Person 2: Because you are ugly Person 1: Why am I ugly? Person 2: Because you have bad features. Person 1: Why do i have bad features? Person 2: It's your genetics. Person 1: Why is it my genetics Person 2: Cuz that's the way god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: Because god's god made you Person 1: Why Person 2: Because the god of god of god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: That's the way the god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of (GOES ON FOREVER!!!) made you.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Depending on the amount of saliva you produce each lick the answer to this question varies species to species.

the WNBA

A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

What's worse than having a worm in your apple? 2012.

Why couldn't the bird fly? cause it was a penguin

Q.who is Tiny, a lion and has no friends and is a bald eagle? A.Rory Johnston

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

So one time there was this woman learning...

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

Knock Knock.. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Daves dead. This is Darrell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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