What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

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If you are reading this you are a nerd

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Why can't Ray Charles see? Because he's dead.

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a guy walks into the bedroom with a duck in his arms, his wife is in bed half nakid. he then coments out loud this is the pig im f**king. his wife says huny your holding a duck. then he with a serious look on his face says im sory i wasent talking to you

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this kid named terry stockton thought it was funny to get someone in the ankle lace then the kid got up and pucnched him in the face so hard he had a seizure

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Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

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So this fat guy farts. It smells.

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What's the difference between a guy who sees the glass half empty and a guy who sees the glass half full? The first guy is happier because his tables tip more than the second guy's.

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"what's fat,stupid,and has a shell" "i don't know what" "you, i lied about the shell"

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a double whiskey. The bar man says "what's with the long face"? The horse replies "My wife left me, took the kids with her, took everything, I'm devastated"

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2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

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Gas prices are so high, I've had to resort to walking and riding my bike.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.

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Yesterday i had a conversation with my husband. I asked him if he slept with another women. He said yes

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Immigration Laws

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How many dead babies does it take to fill up a car? Dead babies should be reported to the police and not be stuffed into cars.

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What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

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how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

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how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

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Q: why was the man punched in the face? A: I did like him.

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what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

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Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

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Why couldn't the black baby swim? Babies do not posses the muscular capacity nor technique to enable them to properly swim.

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Why did the leaf fall off the tree? Because it was Fall.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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