i look around to find that my air head is missing, i then figure out that i had eaten it.

What did Selena Gomez say to JB? We're breaking up cuz u smell like French fries and you look like a poop

what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

Knock, Knock. Who's there? You're mom. It's your.

what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

What goes up but never comes down? This dick

boy and girl are flipping a coin, coin lands on heads, boy: get down bitch

A cow walks down the stairs. Not really. They are incapable of walking down stairs. It actually died on the roof.

A woman walks into a bar but is promptly returned to her kitchen by an officer of the law. Later that same evening, she is beaten mercilessly by her husband for her outright disrespect for the social restrictions imposed upon her gender.

Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

Roses are green violets are brown wait a minute..........my shoes untied

Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

What do you call a Rhino and a Lion having sex? Pointless, since they can't reproduce

Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

Doctor, people dont notice me anymore, doctor?... HEEEEEEEEEEEY!

Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwimg out all the W&Ws

Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

why couldn't the little boy sleep? he was being tortured.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought is was yours.

yo Mama so stupid a robber stole her t.v and she ran after him yelling, YOU FORGOT THE REMOTE!

What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

the power to turn magnetism into light

Should a pole bump an alarm?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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