A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

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Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

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Q: how do u wake lady gaga up? A: you poke-poke poke her face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

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How do u keep annoying children off your front lawn? Molest Them.

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What's the scariest thing about the dark? There's a black man in my bed.

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's ripe and orange? A ripe orange.

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Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

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What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

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Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

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Why did the mexican jump over the fence? It was a shortcut.

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What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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I had 99 problems Solved them all

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How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

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What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops