What's brown and red but looks purple? Mixed paint!

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Gay jokes arn't funny. "Come" on guys.

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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A Terrorist walks into an airport. - He then blows himself up.

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How come the dog didn't want to go into the sun? -Because it didn't want to turn into a hotdog.

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There's a black guy in a mansion. What's he doing there? He owns it.

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Why did the boy fall off the zipline? He had no arms.

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How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

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What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

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What's the difference between a park bench and a hobo? The park bench can support a family

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sorry got to poo

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Why is the chicken on the road? Cuz he died trying to get to the other side.

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Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

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A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

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roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in an apple within a worm inside your apple...

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YOU

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how do you find a ghost? shoot yourself.

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? None. While they were figuring out who to change the bulb the bulb lit a spark and the house caught fire. Everyone but one died. The black guy couldn't change the bulb because the bulb was lost in the fire.

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Mexicans are inferior because! BEECUZ! Listen buddy, to be honest, I get girls every now and then because I am what they all want me to be, myself. You are a great friend as far as I am concerned, and I care a lot about you considering I saw you once like... 13 years ago, but I do not spend an entire night chatting with someone on horsehead network out of all things unless that person means a lot more than sex for me... Hell, if I did not feel that nice about you, I would not even have wanted to, and that sounds really awkward for a guy like me to say, believe me, you wont be losing a friend. AS LONG AS YOU KEEP GIVING IT TO ME! I am joking, but this is who I am (sadly) I have many female friends, and yeah well, some I well you know, I am just not the kind of guy that listens to girls sob stories, and pretend to be their gay best friend, while I watch someone bad ass come and bang her... Nah, I am more like that bad ass banger, except I dont break girls hearts afterwards. Seriously, I am really fond of you, to the point where I will say something guys mostly do not say: If you are feeling pressured into stuff, then dont do it, you wont be losing a friend, I wanna spend an intimate night with you (day, shower, on the breakfast table all that) but thats because I really like you, we have built some intimacy in pretty short time if you ask my opinion... See? Now I am being honest and leaving myself vulnerable, and I do that because I honestly care about you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops