You know what they say about men with big feet? Big penis.

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You come across a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. Why are you telling a joke? Go make sex.

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Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

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I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

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A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

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The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Why is the ground wet It rained

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Why isn't Michael Jackson aloud at Disney world? He is dead.

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If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

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What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

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A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

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what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

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If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

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Think of a number between 0 and 2 That's how many times you're going to die in this life

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Q: What do dogs and wind have in common? A: They're both blue. Except the dog. Or the wind. Wind is colorless.

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Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

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What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

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Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

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69

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Q: What did the black man say to the sheriff? A: Good day, officer

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops