Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

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Why are black people not allowed to play football? They are.

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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poo

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A guy says to a palm reader "You look like you've seen a ghost. Palm reader replies "You've got cum on your hand."

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What do astronauts and Wayne Rooney have in common? I don't know. Ok.

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why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

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What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

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Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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What's 10 + 3 x 22 ? Cake.

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of this joke, but your mom is a whore.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet,

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what did one barstool say to the other what theres a butt on me

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What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

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I was walking down the street next thing I new 15 blacks and Hispanics died in a dive buy. The next day every white guy in the cars doin the drive buy blew up ohwell

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What do an airplane and a strawberry have in common? They can both fly.... Except for the strawberry

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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Why did the Liberal tell the truth? If one ever does we will have the answer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops