Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

In a galaxy far, far, away.... There were quasars, stars, and various sized meteors.

what is like a duck and quacks ? A duck.

What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

Q: what did the suicide bomber say after the attack? A:

Mom: Uncle toms coming home from the war Jimmy: What are we going to do Mom: Bury his coffin he hit a land mine .............. Jimmy: ^O^

Why did the girl get run over by a bus? The bus driver was blind.

How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

Your a bus driver, at the first stop, 4 people get on. At the second stop, 2 people get off. At the third stop, 7 people get off. At the fourth stop, everyone gets off. What is the bus drivers name?

How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

Who has, there are like... Well actually I might have watched them all, downloaded them in a torrent... A LEGAL torrent of course... NOT. Well, you get a hint, it looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, and its a trick question since Mickey Mouse was not actually drawn by Disney, so yeah.

What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

i had sex.

There once was a man from Peru, Whose limericks all stopped on line two.

Why did the man go to the doctors? He was concerned about his health.

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Why did the boy fall out of his seat? He was being strangled with a piano wire.

whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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