Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

j

Why is the ground wet It rained

If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

Think of a number between 0 and 2 That's how many times you're going to die in this life

You know what they say about men with big feet? Big penis.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

You come across a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. Why are you telling a joke? Go make sex.

The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

Drew Knowles is gay

Q: What do dogs and wind have in common? A: They're both blue. Except the dog. Or the wind. Wind is colorless.

I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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