A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt, its just a myth

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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What do you call a bright orange fish? A gold fish.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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What did the taxi driver say when the black man got in to his taxi? Where to sir?

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have aids, and now you do too!

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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What is a vampire's favorite desert? Assuming they are real I dont think they would enjoy it in the daylight, so really there's no point.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a girl who was knocked off a swing by a fridge.

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Why did Johnny fall down? Because I threw tropical fruit at him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet and so are you, but the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl empty and so is your head.

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what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

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tim tebow and mark sanchez will lead the jets to the superbowl

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roses are red viloits are blue Bernard is hot but then i led to you

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rocky is staring at us from outside...

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WARNING!: THIS JOKE MAY BE OFFENSIVE::: three mexicans wanted to cross the united states borders when they were greeted by a border guard with a gun. the guard tells the three mexicans that if they wanted to pass the border, they will have to do as he says, to which the 3 of them agrees. the guard tells them to go gather a pair of fruits, so like that each of them went their own way to go get some fruits. the first mexican came back with a pair of apples. The guard orders him to stick both of them up his ass and if he makes a sound, the guard will kill him. The mexican obeys and sticks the apple halfway when he screamed. the guard killed him. The second mexican came back with a pair of cherries. The guard ordered the same thing and told him the same thing. the second mexican made 1 cherry and a half when he giggled. So he died also. when he got to heaven, he meets the first mexican. to which the 1st mexican asks, "why did you laugh? that was so easy!" and the 2nd mexican responded, "i giggled because i saw the third mexican coming with a pair of water melons."

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar and the bar says "ouch!"

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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Relax, it simply would not be working out for you if your mother was nearby, you see, the subconcious is limited by the concious mind, so if your subconcious can detect your mother (or anyone but me nearby) your conscious mind goes "uh oh" and it stops. Oh, right, and considering you can still type, how about we increase the effect into... I dunno, six billion? Yeah six billion. Anyway, the next time you want to experience it, just poke your nose, and since we do not want you to poke your nose off, you only do it once and you can yourself decide when it ends, at this level you should not be able to type, but if you want to type you can of course turn it off.

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Why couldn't Bruce drive a truck? Cause Bruce was a Fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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