My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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Q.what is worse than finding a worm in your apple? A.finding two worms.

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What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

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What do you get when you stab a man in the leg with a knife? A court summons because you have committed a horrible crime

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Roses are red violets are blue I have altimers cheese on toast Srry bout the spelling. I couldn't REMEMBER!

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How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

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What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

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9/11 my birthday

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have safe sex

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A black man walks into a bar. He paid his tab and couldn't have been more polite.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road ? because half way acroos he got hit by a car and the animal heath care had to take him away and put him down

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whats brown and booky a book.

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Why did Sara fell off her swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sara

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You know what would be funny? If the Incredible Hulk asked Spiderman to change his diaper.

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Bark I'm a tree

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Roses are red Violets are black Why is your chest as flat as your back?

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're adopted and Santa Claus isn't real

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

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I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

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Why did the teacher ask her student about the test? Because she was in the hospital the day of the test because her husband was hit by a rail road spike and died but she was so devoted to her job she wanted to know.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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