Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

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Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

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Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

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Why couldn't the dumbass go to colledge? He couldn't open the door.

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How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

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Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

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what word starts with 'p' and ends in 'orn'? popcorn you sickos

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

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What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

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John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

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If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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