Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

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A paralysed man falls over.

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Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure.

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Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

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Why was the Black man running with a T.V.? Because he had just purchased a new LCD FlatScreen from BestBuy, and a torrential downpour had just began and he didn't have a free hand to hold up his umbrella.

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I like touching my boobs

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A man walked into a bar. He bought a pint.

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Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

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Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

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Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

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Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

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Lewis

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What is both blue and yellow at the same time? Green.

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Dig a big hole in your front yard and wait next to it so when people walk by they'll ask "Why is there a hole in your front yard?" to whcih you will reply "I don't know. Do you wanna play Monopoly?"

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why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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