The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

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You know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Because you touch yourself.

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Why are you bored? because fungus grows in your eyeballs so you try to stab it out but you end up blind and dead lol

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Why did the black man get sent to prison? He had committed many crimes and was finally caught by the police.

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Whats gay, has a nice ass, and can such a mad dick? Everyone at LNS, including me, Glenn. Just kidding I like bitches.

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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Why did the boy fall out of his seat? He was being strangled with a piano wire.

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"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

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Why couldn't the Nativity have taken place in France? The winters are not warm enough to sleep in an animal cave without getting hypothermia, and there was no census taking place at the time.

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I'm gay Mr Goodwin

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What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

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why did the girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? A wheelchair

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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How do you tell the difference between a white family, and an albino black family? The albino black family suffers from a lack of pigmentation, while the white family just has a naturally pale skintone.

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Uh... No? Listen, the other 2 people that bother using this "site" (excuse for one) would not give a damn, and if some world government are after us they wont find shit. What? If I said no you would hack this site? My mother can hack this site, thats what makes it so useful for us... SO PLEASE DO NOT TELL EEEEEEEEEVERYONE THAT MY MORALS AND SHIT ARE ALL CODES THAT NOBODY HAS THE BRAIN TO DECODE PLEASE <<<<<<<<< *Sarcasm detector goes off* Seriously though, nah, dont hack nor delete anything, I kinda like how I got some thumbs ups on the comment section where I shared about my mother finally dying and me feeling the world against me great etc blahblah, "Erica" and "Wizard" thumbed those up and are now with us (seriously Wizard? Geek somebody?)

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon

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I had a lemon. hi.

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Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. He is soon kicked out as he is underage.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops