A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a nice evening.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Roast Beef is a solid and Pea Soup is a liquid

what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

Friends are like trees, if you deprive them from water they'll die.

Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

Whats funnier then a dead baby? A lot of things.

What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

how do you get a happy man to stop smiling? hit him in the face repeatedly untill he is dead.

How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

Friends are like snowflakes When you pee on them they disappear

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

Why did Little Billy trip? Because I shot his foot off.

a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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