Tool will release their 5th album this summer.

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Yes!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!! Yes!!!

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What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

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why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

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Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

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What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

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What is the difference between a woman and a whale? One has big whiskers and is fat and filthy, the other one lives in the sea and is a mammal

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Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

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big fat hairy gigantic enourmous erectionn CC

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A man walks into a bar he's drunk and can't feel it But he's ok

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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I don't know which one is emptier my bank account or my love life

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

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What's white and sticky? Snow. What were you thinking of?

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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knock knock whos there steve i dont know you go away

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Why did the chicken cross the road... so people could keep asking that question for 4000 years

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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What do you call a black man eating dessert? A man of African ancestry enjoying a sweet treat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

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What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops