What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

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why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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Why did the 100 year old man die? He was really old and his heart stopped beating after his BLT.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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What did Sam Houston Say to Jim Bowie when he say all the Mexicans coming Towards the Alamo? That's a lot of Mexicans.

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A little boy who can't reach the doorbell.

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Brandon Bass's career average for assists is 0.7 a game. guess what his nickname is bassy

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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Why did John break down in tears? Because he was molested as a child.

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I once saw a picture of a man who was bloodily murdered with his testicles replacing his eyes. then i had a nightmare, that was completely unrelated

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? HA!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? I don't know, why don't you go ask him?

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

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Why did the black kid die? He had cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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