Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

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Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

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What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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Friends are like snowflakes When you pee on them they disappear

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So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

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Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

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what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

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Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

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A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Roast Beef is a solid and Pea Soup is a liquid

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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how do you get a happy man to stop smiling? hit him in the face repeatedly untill he is dead.

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knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

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Whats funnier then a dead baby? A lot of things.

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Friends are like trees, if you deprive them from water they'll die.

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Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

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HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops