The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He Died Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He was stapled the the first koala

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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The original anti joke. What is jeopardy?

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

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Antijokes?! More like Antijakes!!!

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To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

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Why is it not safe for turkeys to do maths? Because they don't have the mental capacity to carry out the calculations correctly, which would be a danger in jobs such as engineering or the space industry. Furthermore, they are unable to understand the concept of numbers or symbols and therefore have no motivation to solve mathematical problems; and even if they did, they don't have the dexterity or education to write out the solutions.

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Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

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I recently found out I have aids just kiddin heres the real joke... I recenly found out that Philidelphia means "City of Brotherly Love" and I said so do people in philly say its always free hug day in Phillipd fun house in philly?

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - To rape you. Knock Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

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A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

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What's that Lassie? Timmy fell in the well again? And you couldn't care less because the stupid kid never looks where he's going?

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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You're tearing apart, Lisa!

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A man walks into a bard with a politician, an Asian man, and a sailor. They all get drinks and have a good time.

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A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops