'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

thumb_up thumb_down +34

1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the ginger say to the blond? Hello, what is your name?

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

thumb_up thumb_down +32

I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops