Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

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Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

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Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

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what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

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What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

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silver bullet?

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What did Siri say to Cortana? Nothing. Someone has to say something in order to activate either one of the voice recognition devices.

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Roses are red, VIolets are blue, Tulips are white, Sunflowers are yellow

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

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What did the kid with turrets say? Many swear words but he can not be blamed for this because he has a disease that make him unable to control many of the things he says.

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flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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Wanna hear a joke? that disabled guy who wants to climb mount everest.

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What's black and doesn't work? My blackberry

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What do you call a joke book without a title? A joke book!!!!

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What do you call a black man throwing jars of flaming fruit preserves at a Jewish basketball player. MEXICO

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

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A blonde has a headache, so she goes to the doctor. The doctor prescribes some Advil, she takes it, and then feels significantly better.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

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Homo say what?

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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If a tree falls in the forest, does anyone hear it? no, but it was home to several endangered species that are now extinct

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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