What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

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Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

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Why was the Black man running with a T.V.? Because he had just purchased a new LCD FlatScreen from BestBuy, and a torrential downpour had just began and he didn't have a free hand to hold up his umbrella.

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What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

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Poop

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Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

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I have a really funny joke.

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You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

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What would Jesus do? Something worthy of having him nailed to a cross.

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What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? 2 weeks to live...

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What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

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Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

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Laugh

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

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What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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