How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

Where was the declaration of independes? At the bottom

what looks like a bug, lives in larch mount and lives in a mansion? Aodhan Hearty, lied about the mansion... he lives in a web with his buggy family

Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

Person 1: Hey how's your day? Person 2: Good Person 1: Cool

- What would you say if you'll see a Mexican eating hamburger in fast-food restaurant? - Enjoy your meal.

how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

what happened to the man who is standing in the rain? he got wet

Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

What happened to the boy after his life saving surgery? He died of an unrelated disease.

Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

sometimes i put my hands on the floor tuck my head into my cheat and lean forward... because thats how i roll

Will there be love in your future? Click the hand with the love-line that is closest to yours

How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

What did the business man say to the homeless person? Get a job

What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

So an African American man and another man of Hispanic, more specifically Mexico, are riding in the backseat of a car, who's driving? Probably their private chauffeurs, but most definitely not someone related to the Police Department.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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