Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

The awkward moment when Delilah got hit by a bus.

How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

SOY COMO SOY Y ME ENCANTA SI NO ME VALORAS ESE ES TU PEDO

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

what is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? dead babies dont stick to the roof of your mouth when you are eating them.

Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

What eats grass and goes MMMMOOOOOOO? A weird person that likes to eat grass and MMMMOOOOOOO

If the covalent bonds of two Hydrogen atoms and one Oxygen atom creates water, which subs are currently on the 5-dollar-foot-long menu at Subway?

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey

How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

Roses are red Violets go poo My name is Dave How bout u

Try this on your friends and make them look dumb So a plane crashes on the border between the USA and Canada. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury the survivors.

What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill called the paramedics

what does a beer and a priest have in common? They both are cold refreshing beverages, except for the priest.

you suck

What do you call double A's? Batteries

Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

What did the man say to the woman? get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

How do you make a gorilla stop chasing you? You shoot him.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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