Why can't Ray Charles see? Because he's dead.

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why did the chicken cross the road. to get to the other side. but it didnt. ROADKILL

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What's even worse than getting a parking ticket on your birthday? Child molestation.

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On the 1st day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . Windows 95 for my PC On the 2nd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 3rd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 4th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 5th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 6th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 7th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 8th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 9th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 9 apps a crashin' 8 megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 10th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 11th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 11 instructions faulty 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 12th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 12 illegal operations 11 instructions faulty 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC

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What has 8 legs and 1 eye? 2 chairs and half a fish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with its grandmother who just happened to live on the other side of the road because the doctor had said this could possibly be her last week.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? I don't eat pizza

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Why did the computer load on facebook? Thats what you typed in.

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what do you call a kid named kid. kid

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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What do you call an Ethiopian with buck teeth? Lucky to have teeth.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie Thum thump Who's there Bethany Hamilton

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

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A man walks into a bar so how many Jews were there when a man called Wellard ate a pizza. Balloons

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Roses are red, Violets are red, you are a liar, oh wait you're not!! MY BACKYARD'S ON FIRE

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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What did the POW say to his captor? I do not want to be waterboarded.

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I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

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This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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