Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

Am I a cat? No, I am a human; cat's cannot type.

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

Aiming with a revolver? That`s fucking overrated. with a heavy powerful revolver such as this one, you do not necessarily need to aim that well at the heart of your enemy in order to blow his brains out.

Q: Why did the little girl scream? A: She didn't have a rape whistle.

What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

Why are Pine trees green? Because light reflects at different wavelengths, and the chlorophyll, found in chloroplasts, being abundant in the needles of pine trees, Reflect the correct wavelength for green.

i have to tell you a knock knock joke. but you have have to start it..

What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

Nicki Minaj walks into a bar... there's no punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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