whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

Nero here, nice to see you guys again, now you know why my babbling has been excessive (and pissed at the comments below, but now that the pills are working I am calm) Anyway, yeah point Zero is my "world" now, and its been thriving under my values (something I feared would just work on paper, and if so such beliefs would all been for nothing) As for hero... Well insert something like "I am no hero, I just do what is right" or something cheesy, or... Well, thats what I do really... Since nobody uses this site Ill extend the time you "former followers" can chat, as I got some nice stuff to share, and might just share a bit before I pass away (nah, but I will sleep when tired), I got a lot to do tomorrow.

I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

what do women and men have in common? nothing, women are inferior

so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

The 80's called. They need their couch back.

your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

Three guys walk into a bar. They each have a few drinks. Then all three leave responsibly in a taxi.

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

Peter charas threw a masterball at a level 20 Zubat!!!!!

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

why are black people so fast? because there black

Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

What do a squirrel and a cigarette have in common? -They are both perfectly harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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