Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

thumb_up thumb_down -33

knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Are you okay? Here, let me take you to the hospital." The woman is now healing nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the little girl cry? The little girl cried for mercy as her attackers violated every inch of her innocent body, tearing her up from the inside until her organs were forced out of her anus and blood squirted from her ears as the pressure inside her body exceeded to a maximum. After the attackers were done with the corpse, they cut off her limbs and stapled them to her head.They placed her now decomposing body on the front porch of the worried parents' house and rang the doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you get when two chickens cross a road? -Salmonella stricken hobos

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

thumb_up thumb_down -35

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

thumb_up thumb_down -35

why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -35

a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

thumb_up thumb_down -35

My uncle was involved in 9/11... He called me before the plane crashed into the twin towers, his final words were so comforting... "ALLAH AKBAR!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What's short, ruthless, and asian? Kim Jong Ill

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Whats worse then 10 black men hanging from trees? Kittens

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Whats funny about alexis? she's really a boy!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A black man and a mexican jump of a building to see who hits the ground first. Who wins? Society.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A horse walks in a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?"..... The horse incapable of understanding the humane language promptly poos on the floor and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

There were two elephants in a bathtub. One elephant says, "Hey, could you pass the soap." The other replies, "No soap, radio."

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops