why doesn't anyone like reed? who cares, no one likes reed

A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

Jack and Jill went up a hill to snort a little coke, Jack felt horny , so did Jill. But unfortunately Jack cant's maintain an erection no matter how turned on he is.

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

What's worse than the Holocaust? A Holocaust survivor. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

How did the blonde die raking leaves? She fell out of the tree!

What did the pineapple say to the apple? Nothing, neither can speak.

a blond walks in to a post... OUCH

What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

A chicken decides to cross a road. Unfortunately it gets ran over and does. The end.

I'm pretty sure you can't throw a fridge...

Two Guys Walk into a bar, you would think one of them would've seen it

How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

Let's say you're inside a building and you are lost. You need to find directions to get out. But the building is so big almost like a maze or labyrinth. You start walking until you see 2 doors and each door is guarded by a man. Now in between the 2 doors is a message on the wall. It says: "Dear friend, I assume that you are lost and want to get out. There is hope! You have an option to choose one of these doors guarded by these men. You may ask one of these men which door leads to freedom. However, 1 guard ALWAYS tells a lie and 1 guard ALWAYS tells the truth. If you are to choose the wrong door, you will be locked in the building forever. So choose wisely and ask the right question. Good luck! Sincerely, the owner of the building." So you think to yourself and try to figure out what the hell did you get yourself into. This is a very tricking situation. You have one liar and one honest man. How can you tell which is lying and with is telling the truth? After minutes of confusion and thinking, you have finally decided to ask one guard a question. ----spoiler alert----- So you ask the guard one question. "What would the other guard say is the door to freedom?" The guard said "This door" You choose the opposite door and you are now free. The End [Explanation: You have 2 doors. Let's say door A is losing and door B is winning. If you ask the liar what would the other guard say, he we lie and say door A. So you pick the opposite door, which door B and you win. Now if you ask the truth teller what would the other guard say, he we tell the truth and say the same answer, door A. So you pick the opposite door and win]

If you took all the veins in your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

MAKE

A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

Knock Knock Whos There Policeman Policeman who Please open then door your fathers been in a terrible car accident

Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

Uh, Liz, he is staring at the screen... He says you are right and knows, so he cant get mad, ill trust you both, but it better work, or this one is on me. Oh by the way, yeah he is eating, sorry its late here, and I am the only nurse here about now Ironically this place is full of doctors but they dont seem to give a crap about the man that pays their checks. Doctors said no, Nero said "you are fired" Doctor changes his opinion, glad to see he is taking charge around here, I am just worried about his sleep, he is beginning to halucinate and I doubt any stimulants will help. But fine, ill trust you, sorry, really shaking my boots here, I really do not want to, but this is not about me.

Why did the chicken cross the road. He didn't, this joke gets old really fast

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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