- Anti Joke

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

A white guy jumps over the fence belonging to a Mexican family

why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H20." The second one says "why did you come to the bar if you're just going to have water?" and orders a beer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hurricane Irene.

Why does Justin Beiber look like a girl? Because he achieved international fame and fortune at a prepubescent age, and has made more money before he turned 18 than most people will in their entire lives.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Y did the chicken cross the rode to/ get away from KFC

Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

What's smaller then a midget? A baby midget.

whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

What's brown and adhesive? A stick

Q: What happened when Johnny cheated on his test? A: He got a higher score

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar and the bartender says, " OH MY GOD! YOU CAN WALK?!?!"

Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'll choke you with a hose

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where did my tractor go.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke-'er-face

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!