Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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Why did the personal trainer get fired from the gym? He lacked good customer service skills.

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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What's the only animal that has to be oiled? any animal I can think of

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Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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Why did the middle age man walk across the street? There were no vehicles currently driving on that particular road

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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What do an eagle and a off-white light bulb have in common? Nothing.

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A blonde, brunette, brown walk into a hair salon. They then proceed to each get they're own procedures done then leave not having any contact with each other.

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Oh, hi Dave, come inside.

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What do you call a black man who likes watermelon and fried chicken? Someone who likes good food.

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Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Jake did Why did Isaac cross the road? Because mum told him not to Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Maya was there

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FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? a bike

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Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

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What's the best rabbit for a black person?

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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What do you call a Mexican who likes to eat burritos? A Mexican

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Why celebrate your birthday, its just getting closer and closer the death.

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Whats Funnier than the Holacaust? A: Nothing you asshole!

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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