A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

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Why did the man die? He was old.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

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Why was the Black person afraid of the chainsaw? Be cause it goes run nigga nigga run nigga nigga run

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

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What did the cookie monster eat? Food

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

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When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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Q: What did the blind boy get for his birthday? A: He doesn't know

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NEVER

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I think poop is tasty... just kidding.

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Ben Corbishley

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why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

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Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

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Ask me if I'm Abraham Lincoln. Are you Abraham Lincoln? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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