A horse walks into a bar, the barman says why the long face, the horse says, my dad died this morning.

What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

What do you call a shoe with milk in it.... A milk shoe....

Yo mama is so fat when she went to the fat contest they said SORRY no pros alowed

Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

Q: What's pink and fuzzy? A: Pink Fuzz...

What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

911 jokes are just plane wrong

- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

Bill: Heydidyouknowlosersaywhat Donny: What? Bill: Loser

What did the business man say to the homeless person? Get a job

How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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