What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

what do abortion and a coat hanger have in common? they both contain 4 vowels

An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

Whats the difference between a pizza and a black man. A pizza can feed a family of five.

How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

How do you make seven an even number? You don't, it's impossible.

Q: why did the boy fall down when he was walking home? A: he was murdered.

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

THE GAME

What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

A man with a magic watch says to a prostitute, "My magic watch says you are wearing any underwear." "YOU HAVE MAGIC WATCH?! Can it tell time too??!!!"

How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

How do u know the difference between a adam and rappers you dont they r the same

Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

What does the thirsty butcher drink? Chocolate milk. Because he can.

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I personally really do not know

What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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