What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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How do you convince a therapist that he is crazy? Hide in a fortress made of sporks wearing nothing but a belt, and start hissing and throwing paint at him repeatedly.

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I have a pint or two.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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Why do jews have big noses? Because the air is free!

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how many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? --probably just one, unless cerebral palsy runs in her blood, therefore her aid would assist her.

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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How do you kill a bunch of flies in one swat? Smack an African kid in the face.

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What does a salmon and a falcon have in common They both live underwater except for the falcon.

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What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

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A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

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What kind of gun cant shoot bullets Hand guns

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try this on someone: Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock Who's There? Knock Knock They will keep asking who's there while you laugh

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

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What did hitler do with the vegetarians? Nothing, because he was one.

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What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

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A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

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How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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Why did John fall off his bike? Because, he is a fish and fish cannot ride bikes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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