what is green an invisible? this cabbage

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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what do an elephant and a mouse have in common? nothing

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Once upon a time, a handsome prince met a beautiful princess. They both fell in love with each other. They then got married and lived happily ever after.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Why doesn't Batman exist? Because he was made up.

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why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

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what did one elephant say to the other one? nothing silly elepehants dont talk

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A man had sex with his secretary. She was his wife.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, he died.

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What's worse than having a worm in your apple? 2012.

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What do you call an Interlochen Arts Academy Student with no talent? A comparative artist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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What's 1+1? 69.

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Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

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Your Mom

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

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What did Dave tell me on Tuesday? "It's Wednesday, dumbass."

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roses are red,violets are blue,faces like yours belong in a zoo,but don't worry i'll be there to,not in a cage but laughing at you!

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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Q: why cant elvis draw a picture. A: cause hes dead.

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How did the baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops