What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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whats the difference between a black guy and pizza? a pizza can feed a family.

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Why did the monkey eat the pineapple? IDK, ask Sam D

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How do you make a Child cry? Slaughter his dog and feed it to him convincing him its Chili

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Q. What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A. An horse.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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What do you call people in a plane crash? Whatever, i wasn't on the plane.

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How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

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What do you call cheese that isn't your's Well it would depend on what type of cheese it actually is

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What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

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Two Christians are on their way to church. They stay for prayers and have a lovely lunch.

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Why was the black man in school detention? For sleeping in and showing up late accidently

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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I couldn't decide whether to buy a pepperoni or a meat feast pizza? So i got neither and my two year old son died of starvation.

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Q: Why did the guy ring the doorbell? A: Because he was sick of all the crappy knock-knock jokes

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The name "Hunter Barksdale".

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Roses are red Violets are silly Grease up your flaps Cause here comes my willy!

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Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

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I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

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how do you hurt sombody? cut off their legs.

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Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

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Why is there trees? Because they change color... Oh yeah and for oxygen by Burflared

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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