Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? -Who's there? Not the girl.

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Why was the girl on the ground? She jumped off a bridge.

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth on a piece of pizza? Because the pizza was on fire.

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because Martin Handford drew him that way to make him unique and distinguishablefrom the hundreds of other drawn people (and animals) in the pages of the children's game book, which incidentally is known as Where's Wally in numerous non-USA countries.

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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why wouldnt you come to the dark side? i spit in the cookies

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What's worse than finding a worm in you apple? The holocaust.

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A British man walks into a dentist's office.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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A man named Jake walks into a bar. The bartender says hi jake... The End

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why couldnt jimmys feet touch the ground? he was hanging.

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why did the person die? He was 90 years old and was sick. Its natural

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Q: Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? A: Neither did he.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Q: How do you tell a Jewish person that you love them? A: You tell them "I love you".

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How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What do you calla baby nailed to a wall? Art.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops