What did Hitler say to his wife? It's time to go start the Holocaust.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender. And there was nothing funny about that.

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Why was Allen late for work? He was mauled by a bear. Allen is dead.

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4 Jews are killed during a car accident, the whole city mourns over there death and create a plaque in their honor.

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what does a baby sound like in a microwave. i don't know i was masturbating

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i used to take arrows to the knee,til i took one to the balls.

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

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A mexican and a black person are in the back of a car. Whos driving? A bus driver.

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

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There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

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vitamin c

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What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

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why ya gotta be so rude? cause i can

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You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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friend 1: Alright man, i got your back friend 2: AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

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Argon walks into a bar. The bartender yells, "Get the hell out!" Argon doesn't react.

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Why was the bus company sued? For substandard national safety regulations

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Q: Why did the cheerleader drop her pom-poms? A: She was knocked unconscious from behind and repeatedly sodomized by a convicted rapist.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. I said who's there? Knock Knock. WHO THE FUCK'S THERE, GODDAMNIT? Knock Knock. PLEASE STOP IT STOP IT OH GOD STOP IT Knock Knock SWEET DEAR JESUS GOD CHRIST STOPSTOPOHGODSTOPITNOW Knock Knock. FORGODSSAKECOMEIN. Hello, Mark. Oh, hi, Steven.

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A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER." The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it. "I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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