Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

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A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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Q: why was the man punched in the face? A: I did like him.

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Ever hear the joke about the blind guy taking care of the baby ? ... Good, because it's not funny to make fun of blind people and I doubt a blind guy would ever be legally taking care of a baby.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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Why don't you run over a black guy on a bike? Because It's probably your bike..

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A bear walks into a bar. Animal control was contacted and the bar was evacuated.

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An alien just ate your family and all of the things you love

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what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

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How many dead babies does it take to fill up a car? Dead babies should be reported to the police and not be stuffed into cars.

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How do you get a clown off a swing set? You throw an axe at his head when he's not looking.

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you know your just like my pinkie toe........eventually i am going to bang you on a table

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What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

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How do you confuse a Blondel? Tell her there's a demon in her liver

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There are 2 men are standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is named Peter

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? I cry when I chop up an onion.

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What did little ben get for christmas? A dead grandma

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NASCAR

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Your Face.

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Nuneaton..

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Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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This is in Spanish when you're not looking.Just kidding, that's not possible. It's actually German.

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Chuck Norris got hit by a train. It was a very bloody and sad incident and he will be missed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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