yomamas so fat it made Ben kanobi say thats no moon thats yo mama!

The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

Caca.

You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

why didn't the mexiczn eat the black man's cooking? because it wasn't good

Rebecca Black walks into a bar she took the back seat

Why wasn't the TV remote working? It was out of batteries.

Why did princess diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing her seatbelt

How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

Your tell your girlfriend to make you a sandwich, she actually makes one for you.

Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

wommmoaooammaaa

If you share rice between 30 Africans what do they each have? Aids.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 went to a house party. 7 was there. 7 and 6 kind of new each other. They went to the same school, but weren`t really friends. All night 7 was giving 6 strange looks. 6 started feeling uneasy, so he left the party early. When 6 got in his car 7 was inside waiting for him and pulled out a gun. Luckily 6 got away from 7 safely, but has been scared of him ever since.

A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

How do you kill half the Mexican population? through a penny of a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them its still down there.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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