Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

Rebecca Black.

your momma is so fat that she should be worried about her higher risk of heart disease, diabetes, and ugliness.

Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

I touch my sons dick XoXo Wendy.

A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

no jokes left :( ill try to make some more the ones with nude in my comments is mine

When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't. Before it could cross, it was killed and then consumed by an average American

Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

What's old and baggy? An old bag.

What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

What is white and can't climb trees? Powdered sugar.

What did the the White blood cell say to the bacteria? Nothing. Its a cell. It goes through phagocytosis.

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

What do you call 47 black people dead at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible hate crime

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

what is the difference between a white woman and a black woman.. i raped the black one

Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the fried chicken restaurant... BAWK BAWK cannibal

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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