knock knock who's there me me who It's me your son who was in prison for 6 years for false charges of attempted homicide

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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Where does the girl with one leg work? Ihop

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A man walks into a bar. He has had a tough day at work and unwinds with a beer. He goes home to his loving family. He makes love to his wife that night. It's good but not great.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot. WOW your racist!

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A blind man cant see this joke, so I probably shouldnt write it..

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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb? It would probably be the court janitor who was responsible for that job, rather than the lawyers.

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If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

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Knock Knock. GO AWAY!

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WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

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Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, No Professionals."

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Me: How can you tell if somebody's a Nazi? Friend: How? Me: Their killing people in a ghetto. Friend: My friend was shot in a ghetto. Me: So, does that make him a Jew? Friend: No, he was just killed in a big ass oven.

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Listen Erron, what`s wrong? I would have told you to go fuck yourself if it where not for the fact that AzureDragon just left for the cafeteria and is nowhere to be seen.

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Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

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What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

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what do you call a black man living in Brooklyn making over ten-thousand dollars a week? a hard worker

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What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

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Why did the man put his money in the freezer? hes retarded.

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What's black on top and white on the bottom? Half an oreo

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There were two chippendales in a bar - what were their nicknames? Chip and Dale

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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