Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's Black

How do you call a hispanic man crossing the border? First you must find out his phone number, then using a different phone make a phone call to him.

why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

Why is there trees? Because they change color... Oh yeah and for oxygen by Burflared

What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

Q: Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench. A: A bench is an object and a mexican is a human being.

whats worse than falling off of your bike? thats as bad as it gets,try to think of something else

knock knock? who's there? a guy..... so the man open's the door and the guy clutching a knife stabs repeatedly at his chest killing him and drags his body down into his cellar locking him away from the open world. by Mad James

what is brown and sticky? a stick.

What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

Justin Bieber.

Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get mowed down by a tractor

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

why am i a dick head. because my gcse's spelt fudge and i dont like fudge so i project my anger into boss things

Q:Why did Hitler lose World War II? A:His "gas" bill.

There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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