Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

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Why did Micheal fall off his bike? Someone threw a chainsaw at him.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

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Why? Why not?

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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I am so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

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Ben has 3 apples and Charlie has 2 apples, how many carrots can fit in my anus? Banana, because cows have 4 legs

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why'd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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What is the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? A dolphin is not a ghost

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What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

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why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, I like Tities and so do you

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Guess who is violent. Osama

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

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What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

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A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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When life gives you limes....... first you have some problem and second u throw them at people

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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What's black and white and red all over? The dead kitten on the road.

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Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops