Continents are large islands.

How many pastry chefs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. It's a fairly simple job.

pudding

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

joke hahhahahah where did u find that joke, on the internet

What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing

If you were on an island with one wish what would you wish for? To get off the island

What do you call a orange BAD GRAMMER

What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. A heated religious debate ensues in which everyone is uncomfortable and leaves questioning their own faith and fearing the unknown.

What do communists and strawberries have in common? You can eat them.

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

Your dad is so gay, he lovingly marries another man and selflessly adopts you.

How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

How many light bulbs? 1

What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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