What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

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Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I am a dog.

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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Boys have swag, real men have class

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A Jewish man with a 20 mile boner walks into a wall. Which body part hits the wall first? His nose

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So everything, the chat we had before was all you know, a game so I would call you? I am not sleepy but I can wait until you can confirm everything.

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Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

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Tell me you're a rapist. You're a rapist. This joke makes no sense. Mashed potatoes.

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whats long ,hard and full of sea men ? a sumureen

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Steve Jobs is alive.

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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Roses are red Violets are red My lawn is red My fences are red It appears my garden is on fire.

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Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there" "BOO" "BOO WHO" "No it's just BOO"

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Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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Why is Helen Keller Blind and Deaf? Because she can't drive!... oh no wait I screwed that up.

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"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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